Watchamacallits

It is amusing how humans coin words to describe their situation in law school. In panda land, pandas don't use any words. In fact, pandas don't really have  to open their mouths to say anything. Pandas just eat bamboo the whole day.

Here are some of the coined words that students use in school:


"Recit" - Recitations. Transforms a classrooms into dark, cold torture chambers.

"On Deck" - You are scheduled to be subjected to recit, torment, death, murder, kill, for a temporary moment. Sends shivers to your spine. "Pare on deck ngayon, kelangan magaral."

"Bokya" - Going totally blank on a recit question. Or giving a wrong answer. A source of depression.  "Pare bokya nanaman ako, and hirap ng tanong ng prof, badtrip."


"Kodak Moment" - Before you get the bokya, the act of standing, smiling, and making pa-cute to the prof because you don't know the answer. It is the picture perfect moment. "Wala akong nasagot, kodak moment na naman ako kanina."



"Call a friend" - You don't know the recit answer. The prof looks away to explain something or writes something in the board. This is the perfect opportunity to glance at your readings or call a friend by doing  facial signal for "ano sagot?"

"Cover me" - positioning in front of your seat-mate so that she can whisper the keywords at  your back. Works well. Keep the voice level low or risk getting caught. This is a reciprocal obligation.

"Missing in action" - A professor will not remember you. You will not remember his face, too. He is always absent; you will meet him once or twice; or he only shows up during exam; or worse, you will not meet him forever. Weird part is sometimes students still fail this prof's subject.

"A walk to remember" - after the class, walk by the side of your prof. Ask questions that you already know. This will definitely make an impression that you are interested in the boring subject. Works well with impressionist professors.

"Ceasefire" - Students ask the prof to suspend the class because they are not ready for a recitation. Sometimes the prof will just discuss. Sometimes he will just dismiss the class. Most of times he rejects the proposal.

"Paparti" - Waste more and more time by throwing a party for the prof on her birthday. Buy some balloons.  Make some confetti. Stage a production number of singing, dancing and party games.  Call pizza hut or shakeys. Use that Palm Card and other discount cards. Works well on Valentines Day, too. "Birthday ni sir ngayon, tara paparti nalang tayo para walang class!"

Lastly, if you don't really know anything. JUST COME UP WITH SOMETHING. Don't just stare at the teacher and go blank. If you say something, he might give you clues or at the very least, it will buy you time.

As it is a mortal sin to answer to leave questions blank in exams; likewise, it is a tragedy to not say anything in recit.

And remember whatever happens, do not say "sir, i don't know the answer" or else, you are doomed. As in. Promise.